Wednesday, February 06, 2008

How to Escape...



A Giant Octopus.
(From Joshua Piven and the fine folks at Worst Case Scenario.)

1. Pull away quickly.
2. If you do not escape, do not go limp. Octopi tire easily, so continue to put pressure on the arms by attempting to swim away.
3. Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms.
4. Peel the suckers from your body. Give the octopus a spear, raft, surfboard, or other object to latch on to. Work quickly, before the arms grab you.
5. Detach the octopus from its anchor.
6. Turn somersaults in the water to irritate the octopus.
7. Swim towards the surface.

I think what intrigues me about this is most of the tips could easily apply to a toxic relationship. Ever been entangled by one of those? Read through the steps again, and see what might apply. Pull away quickly (go for a clean break.) No limping out. Peel that sucker from your body, and if necessary, deflect them to another source. Better do this quickly, before they suck you back in. Turn somersaults (or whatever else it takes) to irritate this person, then swim with all you've got toward breathable air.

Ever been attacked by an octopus? A wild animal? A toxic stalker?

8 Comments:

Blogger TJ Wilson said...

Ok, very creative. Now if I can figure out how to apply that "clean break" to my 10:00 pm craving for a hot bowl of popcorn... every night...

1:09 PM  
Blogger Mathilda said...

I hit my 6,000 word mark in my story today. We had a snow day (didn't know those were possible in grad school, but when you're supposed to get 18 inches...). Page 21... The problem is, it is turning into a novella and I don't know how to STOP the word flow.

2:22 PM  
Blogger "Bluebonnet in the snow" said...

I'm wondering where you are going with this . . . possibly a sneak peak into an issue one of your character's will be facing in your next book???? I'm intrigued to say the least.

4:15 PM  
Blogger Britta Coleman said...

I'm not sure the 10:00 popcorn craving needs a clean break...it may be more of a healing ritual, and one that's good for creativity. At least, that's how I justify it to myself.

Way to go on the word count, Mathilda! Have you considered you might have the start of a--dare I say it--novel?

Bluebonnet, I can't comment on actual stalkers, other than to give a shout out to my fine friends at the Amarillo Police Department and APD swat team. Way to keep a sister safe! As for using it in my fiction, you never know...

7:25 AM  
Blogger Travis Erwin said...

This is hilarious. Now I'll be ready, should I ever run into an octopus here in the Texas Panhandle.

7:35 AM  
Blogger Britta Coleman said...

Be careful, Travis. They can be anywhere.

7:37 AM  
Blogger Kern said...

If I were an octupus, and some swimmer was trying to get away from me, I would pursue until they started somersaults. How insulting. Jumping Jacks would be even worse, how ridiculous are those? I would move down the shoreline in search of a better victim.

Remember to hold your nose when turning somersalts underwater!

10:52 AM  
Blogger dee said...

hmmm...I thought you were supposed to poke them in the eye or something....I supposed si should learn in case I encounter one on the shores of St. Thomas this summer ....of course, I'd rather be wrapped by a sucker than bit by a shark...not sure what that means as far as the relationship thing...hmmm...

6:34 AM  

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